Hating myself

Don't hate yourself ... You are a work in progress girlfriend!!!!

We need to throw Dee a birthday party, OH style

I replied on your other WLS site! Love, Susan

Hi Dee!

I'm glad you chose to rant...it gives me a chance to hopefully lift your spirits with this... LIFE BEGINS AT 40! I am 10 years younger than you, but sometimes have the same sort of feeling.  I sometimes wake up and feel fat, or bloated, especially when the TOM is here...which is at this moment, but I digress...this is about YOU! Age is simply a number, and you are only as old as you feel.  If you think young and positive...you can achieve anything you desire to do. Just hang in there and don't dread 40...embrace it.  You're alive, well, and getting healthy.  There isn't a day that goes by that I am not happy to be alive.  I always find something to smile about or one thing to like about myself, even if it simply a small facial feature, like my eyes or my lips. Getting to a milestone age, always brings anxieties and possibly even guilt for not taking care of yourself sooner.  You just have to tell yourself that you have another 60 years to live at least...*smiles*...and life passes you by way too quickly to dwell on what is negative...or those negative qualities you perceive you have. I'm turning 30 this year and I vowed to lose 103 lbs by my birthday, and I'm already 70 lbs down...I never thought I'd be able to do it without surgery...but thanks to my own motivation and the fear of heart problems associated with being obese...I took control of my life. I know that you can take that control and stay positive.  40 isn't old.  It's just the beginning of your next decade of life.  We live so much longer now than back in the 1700-1800s where 20 was considered middle age...people died at 40-50 because of poor health care and disease. Since there have been a lot of medical advances in the last...oh...300 years, there is nothing you should worry about but yourself...stay positive and everything will fall into place. Turning 40 shouldn't scare you...if you feel depressed just do something for yourself...indulge in a spa treatment or hair dye...you will find that confidence slowly growing inside of you. Stay positive and hang in there.  I'm sure everything will start to fall into place. Oh...I just thought of something...throw yourself an amazing party...with all of your family and friends, get pampered and buy a new outfit for the occasion.  You might feel better with people who love you and care for you for who you are...not who you CAN be. Sorry for the extremely long-winded post...I find I talk too much, but oh well...I have been told I give good advice.  Sometimes I don't think so, but I try my best. Hope this helps! Barbara.

I read your post and HAD to reply... It is the turning 40 thing....That was my worst birthday...I sat there crying thinking this is not where I pictured myself being at 40..No where near where I pictured myself..It was hard to shake...Probably lasted the whole month and then life goes on....Don't worry about being supportive to other people now, this is your time to accept the support from other people...it is a give and take..Take the kind words, the support and let them mold you to be even more supportive to others when you pass this milestone in your life and emotions.....Just remember you are not alone...40 was rough...I had so many dreams of wherre I would be and how glamourous and secure I would be at 40 and where was I? No where near there...It was hard to get over but I did it...at let me tell you I am no better off now looking at 50 in a few years...Hope you are there to help me through that!!!!! Take some time for YOU and do something for YOU without thinking of others first...You deserve it!!!

" I just feel like I need to be more supportive on the boards, but how can I be when I just don't care." You have to take care of yourself before you can help others. Give your doctor a call---Best of Luck :)

You think life is bad at 40?  Wait til you hit the 60's  Actualy I'm glad to be through with minapause and the harmone area in life.  Now that I'm what one year from being officaly a senior I'm loving life.  I can blame it all on my age now.  I don't have to meet others expatations.  My family just shake their heads because they know I'm not going to be anything but what I am ME.  Even my depression is not as depressing and I find that I can use what I have been through to help others who are batteling now.  When I was younger(much) the  thought was it's all in your head get over it.   WELLLLLLLLL excuse me is not my head part of my body?  Does not the same blood that flows to my toes find it's way to my brain?  I did not find life started changing for me until I hit the 40's and then help became more ready to get. DEE, CALL  ME!  WE ARE IN THE BOOK ON EMERALD